My Christmas Was Better Than Yours

And I can prove it.



I bet *you* didn't get a huge coffee mug shaped like a toilet. Admit it. You're jealous. And it gets EVEN BETTER.

I also got a "regular" over-sized coffee mug.



That sucker holds 4 cups of coffee. It's as heavy as I am. *AW YEAH*

I also got a good story. During Christmas lunch my niece (8 years old) said, "Uncle Jeff will you sit by me?" As I sat down she pointed at the seats on her other side. "Mom will sit here and Dad will sit next to her."

My grandmother wandered over and sat in the "Dad" spot. Niece wrinkled her nose a bit and then grinned. "Mom will sit here and Dad will sit next to you," she improvised.

My grandfather wandered over and looked at the "Mom" spot. "Can I sit here?" he said. My niece shook her head side to side. Grandpa laughed and sat down anyway. "Don't worry," he said, "I don't bite."

"Don't worry," I added. "If he does bite, I'll protect you. Actually, no I won't." Niece looked at me like I was crazy (I get that a lot). She was clearly annoyed.

Her mom / My sister sat down next to me. Niece leaned across me to taddle. "Mom, Great-Grampa said that he might bite and Uncle Jeff said he wouldn't protect me."

I grinned and spoke to her. "It's OK, this is just how civilized people behave."

I got a "Eat Poopie And Die" glare. "You're not related to me."

'Tis the season to be kicked out of the family!