See you next year!
Friday, 30 December 2011
Wednesday, 28 December 2011
Big Dawg was late coming into work one morning. His "Gonna be late" email simply said, "Laundry Catastrophe".
Turns out he had forgotten to do laundry the night before. So, he did laundry in the morning. When his nice clean clothes came out of the dryer, he put the full laundry basket in the middle of his living room. Then he dumped his entire breakfast plate into it.
Toast, eggs, and jelly. Apparently there was not even a single drop on the floor. Well done!
Naturally, this could not be ignored. My wife came home the next day with a jar of Jelly. "It's for Big Dawg," she said. She couldn't stop giggling.
I went to work and delivered our little "gift".
I know what you're thinking: That man has impeccable taste in drinking glasses. Oh, and you might also be wondering a bit about the sticky note. Let me zoom in on it...
"Keep away from clean laundry."
Wish him luck. :)
Turns out he had forgotten to do laundry the night before. So, he did laundry in the morning. When his nice clean clothes came out of the dryer, he put the full laundry basket in the middle of his living room. Then he dumped his entire breakfast plate into it.
Toast, eggs, and jelly. Apparently there was not even a single drop on the floor. Well done!
Naturally, this could not be ignored. My wife came home the next day with a jar of Jelly. "It's for Big Dawg," she said. She couldn't stop giggling.
I went to work and delivered our little "gift".
I know what you're thinking: That man has impeccable taste in drinking glasses. Oh, and you might also be wondering a bit about the sticky note. Let me zoom in on it...
"Keep away from clean laundry."
Wish him luck. :)
Friday, 23 December 2011
From P-Ziddy, I present the most wonderful Christmas plus Star Wars picture I've ever seen!It combines the best Christmas movie ever with Star Wars. I mean, honestly, how could it get any better?
You can click it for a bigger version, if you like.
Merry Christmas!
(Note: I may not be posting on a regular schedule next week. Try not to let it disrupt your lives too much, OK?
Wednesday, 21 December 2011
Nice: Carrot Top
Oh, you'd better watch out
You know you can't hide
Santa can find you morning or night
Santa Claus is judging you all
He's got a big list
And to my surprise
Written under "nice" is only one guy
Santa Claus is judging you all
He TiVo's when you're sleeping
He'll watch that stuff all day
He's got a key to your front door
And he will not go away
Oh, you'd better watch out
You know you can't hide
Santa can find you morning or night
Santa Claus is judging you all!
Sleep lightly, friends. :)
Monday, 19 December 2011
Last week was our annual Office Chili Potluck, which doubles as a Christmas party. As usual, we had a Dirty Santa gift exchange!
There were lots of fun moments. M16 (a big Oklahoma State fan) got stolen from 4 times and nearly wound up with an OU Snuggie. LadyPatsFan got a "Jolly in the John" Snowman that sings a wonderful little parody of "Up on the Housetop" (Ho ho ho! Who's gotta go?).
Personally, I thought the funniest bits involved the Kitchen Sheers.
Our office Administrative Assistant is a wonderful grandmotherly lady who I'll call "A+". She opened up a package of kitchen sheers. She is, among other things, an amazing cook. She was genuinely happy to have the sheers.
A little while later, DepartmentHead stole the sheers from her.
Behind me, a gent I'll call "Legend" spoke up. "Hey, why does DepartmentHead's phone keep ringing?"
As we all laughed, A+ gave DepartmentHead a mock hurt look and picked another present. As she started to pry open the paper, Legend spoke up again. "Too bad she doesn't have anything to cut open that paper with."
A+'s second package turned out to be some nice little picture frames. Legend chimed in, "Sure would be nice if she had something she could use to trim down her pictures."
Late in the game, Legend's turn came up. He walked over to A+. "If I steal those frames from you, then you can go steal your kitchen sheers back." And that's exactly what they did.
Legend didn't actually want the frames, but he did get a pretty rockin' blog nickname out of the deal.
There were lots of fun moments. M16 (a big Oklahoma State fan) got stolen from 4 times and nearly wound up with an OU Snuggie. LadyPatsFan got a "Jolly in the John" Snowman that sings a wonderful little parody of "Up on the Housetop" (Ho ho ho! Who's gotta go?).Personally, I thought the funniest bits involved the Kitchen Sheers.
Our office Administrative Assistant is a wonderful grandmotherly lady who I'll call "A+". She opened up a package of kitchen sheers. She is, among other things, an amazing cook. She was genuinely happy to have the sheers.
A little while later, DepartmentHead stole the sheers from her.Behind me, a gent I'll call "Legend" spoke up. "Hey, why does DepartmentHead's phone keep ringing?"
As we all laughed, A+ gave DepartmentHead a mock hurt look and picked another present. As she started to pry open the paper, Legend spoke up again. "Too bad she doesn't have anything to cut open that paper with."A+'s second package turned out to be some nice little picture frames. Legend chimed in, "Sure would be nice if she had something she could use to trim down her pictures."
Late in the game, Legend's turn came up. He walked over to A+. "If I steal those frames from you, then you can go steal your kitchen sheers back." And that's exactly what they did.Legend didn't actually want the frames, but he did get a pretty rockin' blog nickname out of the deal.
Friday, 16 December 2011
Well, not *exactly* killed it. She pushed out a code change that behaved differently on the live website than it did on the test machines. It happens from time to time. It was a small outage, barely noticed, and fairly easy to fix.
The fun part was her reaction. This was the first time she'd managed to clobber the website, so she went into panic mode. None of the rest of us did.
LadyPatsFan: "It's Down It's Down It's Down What Do I Do It's Down It's Down What Do I Do..."
Jeff: (calmly, grinning) "Well, let's take a quick look at [techie details omitted]."
LadyPatsFan: "That Didn't Work And It's Down And That Didn't Work And Now What Do We Do It's Down It's Down..."
Big Dawg: (calmly, grinning) "OK, then all we need to do is [techie details omitted]."
LadyPatsFan: "I Can't Believe It Went Down I'm Never Touching This Again What Just Happened It's Down It's Down..."
While LadyPatsFan struggled to get her breathing under control, Big Dawg and I swapped old war stories.
"Remember that time Farmer came sprinting to my desk because he uploaded the wrong homepage?"
"Yeah... remember when I accidentally assigned my name to all the user accounts on the site?"
"Ha! Good times."
For the rest of the day, every time I walked past LadyPatsFan's desk I said "Hey there, Killer."
Ha! Good times.
Wednesday, 14 December 2011
Some days you just know *know* are going to be a struggle.
I was driving to work one morning, and found myself stuck in a line of slow-moving cars. I hadn't made it to the highway yet, so passing wasn't a realistic option. I could just make out the truck at the front... it was a plumber. I mentally dubbed him "Slow the Plumber", and waited for a break from Low-MPH Purgatory.
At an intersection, I decided to take a detour. It would take me a mile out of my way, but at least then I could cruise at a normal speed. I turned off onto a narrow two-lane road that was blocked by a tree service.
In the distance, I could hear Slow the Plumber laughing.
I finally made it into work. Ever since the Earbud Theft incident, I lock my desk drawers. So, I walked up and tried to take the keys out of my pocket. My hand got stuck.
If I let go of the keys, I could get my hand out. Grab keys = hand stuck. Apparently the story about a monkey with his hand stuck in a coconut is true.
I eventually got the keys out. The pocket turned inside out and there was a slight tearing noise, but I was victorious! Then I tried to take my jacket off, got an arm stuck, and fell over.
I stayed down. Eventually someone found me. "What are you doing down there?" "Trying to break the cycle," I explained.
Dang plumber.
I was driving to work one morning, and found myself stuck in a line of slow-moving cars. I hadn't made it to the highway yet, so passing wasn't a realistic option. I could just make out the truck at the front... it was a plumber. I mentally dubbed him "Slow the Plumber", and waited for a break from Low-MPH Purgatory.At an intersection, I decided to take a detour. It would take me a mile out of my way, but at least then I could cruise at a normal speed. I turned off onto a narrow two-lane road that was blocked by a tree service.
In the distance, I could hear Slow the Plumber laughing.
I finally made it into work. Ever since the Earbud Theft incident, I lock my desk drawers. So, I walked up and tried to take the keys out of my pocket. My hand got stuck.
If I let go of the keys, I could get my hand out. Grab keys = hand stuck. Apparently the story about a monkey with his hand stuck in a coconut is true.
I eventually got the keys out. The pocket turned inside out and there was a slight tearing noise, but I was victorious! Then I tried to take my jacket off, got an arm stuck, and fell over.I stayed down. Eventually someone found me. "What are you doing down there?" "Trying to break the cycle," I explained.
Dang plumber.
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