The Paint Party

My wife and I decided to do something about our bathroom this past weekend. The walls were yellow. I didn't like the idea that my walls could so easily mask a critical bathroom incident.



The first coat went on with minimal brush-slapping, which was nice. The walls and I both had a nice semi-transparent blue layer. My wife was spotless. "How did you do that?", I asked. Her reply was, "Clean living."



Eventually, I stepped in the paint tray. "This is all just part of the process," I explained while wiping my sock on the walls.

Later: "We're nearly done!", my wife shouted. "I think it's turning out nice," I said. "But... it's not too late to go back to the yellow."



She gave me a confused look. "Really?" "No." She hit me. "Dork."

After I got cleaned up, my wife hung me on the back porch with the brushes to dry. She was still spotless.

Naturally.


(note: this will be my only blog post this week. sorry)

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Never Stop

It's a slow blog week. :) I've got no story for you today, so enjoy this jazzy little tune instead.



It's different, but I'm a big fan. I especially love the huge crash that comes at around the 2:50 mark. I still haven't figured out quite how they made that noise... I think they may have thrown half a drum kit into an open piano. You just need to hear it. It's jarring and wonderful.

Happy Thursday!

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It's Hard To Think Up A High-Brow Title For A Low-Brow Topic

Two Christmas's ago, I got a toilet mug as one of my gifts.



I've actually used that mug, too. Unfortunately, it's really easy to bonk myself in the eye with the toilet tank. I did enjoy all the times that folks would suggest that I drink lemonade from it, though. I'd always grin and suggest "lemonade... with Tootsie Roll floaters."

The "Tootsie Roll Floaters" was always a great way to one-up the wise guy. It would also be a great name for a rock n' roll band... but I digress.

P-Ziddy combined my toilet mug with his over-sized Optimus Prime, and the result was glorious.



I can't even begin to tell you how happy this makes me. Optimus Prime on the Thunder-Bucket!



We're office nerds. It's just doesn't get any better than this.

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Optimus Prime Hand-Holding

I re-arranged my potato-head diorama at work to make room for my new "Elvis" figure.



There he is, groovin' in the front, while off to the side... uh...



I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this. I think I liked it better when they were fighting.

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A Pretty Hat

P-Ziddy's four year-old walked up to him one morning when he was about to head out for the morning. She was carrying his ball cap.

"Here Daddy," she said. "Put on your hat."

We have a business casual workplace, unfortunately. "I can't Honey," he explained. "They won't let me wear the hat at work."

"Why not Daddy?"

"I don't know. I guess it's just not very pretty."

The four year-old was dejected. "Oh." She thought about it minute, and the slapped the hat down on P-Ziddy's head.

"There!", she shouted. "Tell them I said it's pretty!"

I'm not sure it's wise to argue with that kind of statement.

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A Better Oil Change

True story: There's an auto service place here in town where we've taken my car once. Only once, because not only did they take longer than they said and charge more than they said, but they also scratched the hood of my car. We opted not to go back.

Not too long ago, we got a flier in the mail from them. There was a coupon for 9 dollars off an oil change. "Really? What's their normal price?", I asked. My wife didn't know, so she called them.

"$40!", the guy on the phone happily replied.

At 9 dollars off, that price is *still* higher than any place else we've ever used. "You've got to be kidding!", my wife said.

"Oh, not at all," the guy insisted. "We know we can charge more because we give you a better oil change."

"Better?" "Absolutely!"

My wife was not convinced. "And will you scratch the hood of the car again?"

This made him pause a moment, but he rallied magnificently. "Absolutely! I mean no! Our oil changes are *better*!"

"That plus a buck 50 will buy a cup a coffee."

The guy faltered a bit. "But... our oil changes..."

"Are better. Yes, I've heard. Have a nice day."

I can get my hood scratched anywhere. No need to be overcharged for it.

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The Lime Ninja

LadyPatsFan and Big Dawg both share a love for Diet Lime Coca-Cola. Big Dawg was headed to his desk with a case of the green goodness when a generous / malicious idea popped into his head.

Big Dawg took one of his cans and snuck over to LadyPatsFan's desk. Big Dawg is a large fellow and does not sneak easily, but when the cause is just he can manage. He reached slowly over the partition wall and gently placed the can of soda just out of LadyPatsFan's line of sight.

The can went, "plink".

Big Dawg ran away. As I mentioned, Big Dawg is a large fellow. The "running away" part involved quite a bit of stomping, scuffing, and tripping. There was nothing subtle about the escape or the route. Godzilla would have been proud.

A few minutes later, LadyPatsFan came by with her open can of soda. She would have arrived sooner, but first she had to open her surprise-o-can and take a big swig because priorities.

"Was that you?..."

Big Dawg happily confessed. "That was me doing my super-sneaky ninja moves!"

"Ah," I said. "The Lime Ninja?"

"Yes!"

The Lime Ninja Delivery Service. Noisy, but full of lime!

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